The Holding Pattern (Not My Best Blog Ever)

ImageEver just stared at a blank screen, waiting for words to magically appear? Ever held a paintbrush in your hand, bare canvas before you, dreaming of pictures that you can’t see? Maybe you’re the kind of person who’s a wizard with systems and flow charts, but there’s no one in need of your managerial skills; or maybe you’re fantastic with kids but marriage and parenthood isn’t exactly on the near horizon.

Welcome to the holding pattern, population buttload.

*****

I had planned to write out a long bit about the holding pattern being similar to pregnancy, but once I got going, I realized it was a stupid comparison. The birth of a human life is not the same as trying to finish that short story you’ve been working on for months. But there is some crossover – the expectancy that comes with trying to produce something you’ve carried for a long time can create similar stresses.

That still sounds lame. Sheesh.

Basically, I have two books stuck in my head. I have the outlines. I have the rough idea of what I want to say. But when I sit down at the keyboard and start typing, I immediately fill like a doofus for even trying to say something about anything. My voice goes away. My fingers stall. I feel the sudden need to go surf for memes.

There’s still a long way to go, it would seem.

Of course, that’s if you subscribe to the idea that creativity works like a fountain. That once you have an idea, the details and actionable parts of that idea will just free-flow behind it. That happens for some people; there are those folks who can just sit down at a keyboard and pound out an entire book or screenplay or essay in one sitting, no stressing required.

I am not one of those people.

Well, maybe for blog posts. But no one’s offering to buy my blog posts and put them into a book, so that brings me back to being stuck.

Sigh.

How about you? What is going on in your life that seems to be taking f-o-r-e-v-e-r to come to fruition? Can you relate to be a citizen of the holding pattern?

2 thoughts on “The Holding Pattern (Not My Best Blog Ever)

  1. My depression that I struggle with interferes with my writing. I am writing a book and at times I can sit down and write two thousand words and then I am unable to for a little while. I know that the devil is trying to stop me from continuing to write for the glory of God. He alone gives me strength to get out of the pit. It is hard, but that is where God comes into play. Also, I am not a leader type of person and God called me to be the lead teacher of the Preschool Praisers Choir with of course my assistant teacher. I am usually a helper and get nervous to plan things and take charge, but God said, that is what He wants…a willing heart to fully surrender and let God take charge of His work with the children. I am shy and nervous, but God gives me courage to do His will for His glory.

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